You become what you think. There is no way around it, life is not a series of events formed from dumb luck. Our realities are constructed by the themes in which we think, and the results of your life are derived from habitual thoughts executed over a period of time. If you think you are not good enough, you aren’t. If you think you are not worthy, you aren’t. The limitations we place on ourselves are not always so obvious, they can be very subtle, yet profound in the way think our reality is.
Our thoughts manifest themselves in the habits of our speech. The words we choose to speak are often a reflection of the mindset we are under. If you want to be happy, you can’t just think happy thoughts, you have to speak happy words and avoid words that demean your happiness. Here are some words that you should remove from your life if you want to achieve a positive and happy state of mind.
I don’t know
There is nothing more finite than saying that you don’t know. Yes, it is certainly okay to not know something, but the way we use the words “I don’t know” implies that there is no reason to find out. I don’t know, end of the story, conversation over. Try saying “I’m unsure,” yes it seems like a semantics play but saying that you are unsure gives the impression that you will explore to find out.
I can’t
You can, but you won’t. If the human spirit has taught us anything is that anyone can do anything as long as desire, passion, persistence and patience are involved. We just give up too early.
Replace your “I can’t” with “I won’t,” and soon you will begin to see the limitations that you place upon yourself. It is completely OK with saying “I won’t,” it is within our freedom to not do something we don’t want to do, but saying “I can’t” is much too easy and it is said without any real introspection. Ditch the “I can’t” and really understand why you won’t.
Idiot
There is nothing more demeaning than calling someone an idiot. In one word you are placing your intelligence over top of the intelligence of another. When we cannot take the time to understand another human being, we go on the offensive and call them an idiot, there is no attempt at empathy. Most often, calling someone an idiot is a knee-jerk reaction to protect one’s ego.
Disappointed
I understand that disappointment is a rightful human emotion, but its overuse in our language is quite disappointing. Many of us live in a constant state of frustration and it stems from the fact that we expect way too much from each other. If your expectations are continually never being met, then it is time that you review your expectations; otherwise, you will never be happy.
If you must hold high expectations from those around you, then don’t default to disappointment, instead help bring others up. Our fulfillment in life centers around our ability to help make others around us better, to lift others up to our expectations. But be careful, sometimes your expectations can be just too high for others to meet. Resist voicing your disappointment, instead, employ empathy.
Cheap
Talk is cheap but stop yourself from talking cheap. Using the word “cheap” seems innocent enough but what cheap implies is spending the less amount of resources regardless of the value. Your happiness is tied to seeking and retaining value in your life and not reducing the price of living. Seek the highest amount of value for the least amount of cost. Stop the cheap talk and instead, when something appears to be cheap, say it is inexpensive, keep your value high and stop focusing on the price.
Hate
If there is any word that steals our happiness, it is hate. It is so easy to say you hate something without even thinking about it. But hate is an awful word as it implies the most profound disdain that we can have for something. Instead of hate, use dislike and remove the hatred from your life. Nothing with any good comes from using the word hate and by consistently misusing it only spreads it around; we both know that the world we live in has too much hate. Stop spreading the hate and remove that word from your lips.