What’s The Problem?

At its core, you and I have the same problem. But we have different stories fueling it. The struggle comes when we try to fit in with the rest of the world, using just our story. That’s impossible to do. Nobody is as intimate with your story quite like you. Stories are felt, and everyone feels things differently. However, everyone can relate to your problem, if you’re courageous enough to share it.

My story is that I was sexually abused as a child, and I survived.

So what? Others have been through much worse than you.

My story is that I like to exercise all the time.

So what? You’re not an Olympian.

My story is that I… so what?

So what? You’re not being you.

What’s my problem?

I need to fit in, I need to be accepted, I need to be loved, and I couldn’t bear not having your approval.

Sound familiar?

The Reason for This Blog

The most magnificent reflections in my life come to me when I work out. There are all kinds of science behind why your mind opens up when you’re in beast mode. It’s the reason why many people become addicted to body movement in the first place -myself included.

Before each workout, I set an intention to learn something about my life and world. And then, I record it on this blog to encapsulate my thoughts and then share them with you.

What Was My Intention?

The intention of today’s workout is to sweat off the negativity that has gripped my mind of late. Inside this thought can of mine, I came pretty close to just walking away from all the things that make me feel uncomfortable and give it all up for mediocrity. Bot how is that going to solve my problem?

How Did I Feel Before?

My legs are pretty sore from the HIIT workout that I did. We did a lot of sumo squats, and my hamstrings and glutes are on fire! The after-effects of that workout made me realize that I need to focus a bit more on my leg workouts. Just not today… LOL.

What Did I Do?

  • Treadmill: Ran 5k at a 4:36 km/min pace with moderate hills.
  • Rowing: Rowed for 5 minutes on a machine that I wasn’t a fan of.
  • StairMaster: Climbed 50 floors of stairs (800 stairs total).
  • Ab set on a machine.

How Do I Feel After?

My legs have had enough of my abuse. I’ll have to give them a little stretching love tomorrow. But overall, I feel better having gone to the gym.

What Did I Learn?

I learned that I identify too much with the stories that I’ve been telling. And instead of addressing my problems, I am addressing the stories instead. This misdirection leads to me seeking validation of my story, instead of seeking the eradication of the problem.

Read Past Fitness Journal Entries: