This Change Is Going To Be Hard

Doesn’t the uncertainty of change suck? Yeah, we can say that it is exciting (and it is at times) but we all fear the unknown. How do you respond to pending change? Do you get irritable, whiny or despondent? I’ve spent most of my summer trying to embrace the change, but I think this upcoming change is going to be hard.

Am I changing for the sake of change?

I’m about to completely tip the apple cart on my workout routine. I know, for most of you, this is not a big deal. It’s just a workout, right? It’s “just” a workout to me. My workout routine has been a lifesaver and a game changer. But now, I have to change it up, it’s not doing it for me anymore. I need to do something new. What that is, have no idea. And I think that’s where this change is going to be hard for me to embrace. I don’t know where I’m going.

For the past 3 1/2 years I’ve been a dedicated HIIT workout animal. I got so good at it, that I even became a trainer. But, over the past few months, my workouts just aren’t giving me the same mojo that they did when I started. My tenure at my HIIT gym is coming to an end this fall and while I know I have to move on, I just really wish I didn’t have to make the change. But I must.

We don’t grow when we stagnate

While there is comfort in what I’m doing, comfort is not what I seek when I workout. I want to feel the battle of resistance between my mind and my limits. Yes, I workout to help my body, but I mostly workout to mess with my mind. After spending so many years hiding from challenge, I not relish in it. So when something doesn’t challenge me, I’ve got to move on and move fast.

All of this to say, I’ve got a big change coming soon. But what I’ve noticed this summer is that I’ve been validation seeking a lot more than normal. Craving the approval of others has been my nasty habit that I’ve been trying hard to fix over the years, but unfortunately, it’s still deeply rooted in me. This summer it seemed to have gone into hyper-drive. Why?

I seek validation when I’m facing change

In the past, I know that I seek validation and approval from others when I’m tired. That’s an easy fix, rest up and get some sleep. That’s not my problem this time around. I’m well rested. But I think with a change coming to one of the most important aspects of my life is causing me to seek validation that I am doing the right thing. Like a child to a parent, I need that approval. Am I doing right?

Perhaps, I need to ask that question to myself and listen to the answer.

Thanks for reading along while I drivel about my 1st world problem. Perhaps I am writing this to get your approval and validation? Yeah, I probably am. But that’s OK though, this is my life’s journal and you’re invited to read. However, I would be lying if I said that I’m not seeking your validation of my thoughts.

I most certainly am. Old habits are hard to break.

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