Conform, I do not. Lonely, I am

Being unique comes at a cost, but it’s a cost worth paying: being lonely.

What is our life about? Is it to accept the norm? Are we to bend and shape our minds to the sharp edges of that thing we call reality? Or are we here to soften the edges and challenge the status-quo? So often what we think and what we do are so very much out of alignment, and when we do become aligned, we are met with considerable resistance from our circles. The world shuns the aligned until the strongly aligned align the world.

That voice you hear inside of your head. You know, the one who tells you that you are not good enough, that you are not tall enough, not small enough, not smart enough and just plain not enough. Is it really you? No. You are always enough, but your inner voice won’t allow you to believe it.

That voice inside of your head is nothing more than the misalignment of your reality versus who you really are. It is the bodyguard who guards who you really are from the world outside of your mind. It keeps you safe from harm, from judgment, from ridicule and guards you from the pain of being alone.

It is really lonely being you outside of your mind as you are the only person in this world who thinks like you, feels like you, breathes like you and moves like you. Only when you live apart from the voice that lives inside of your head can you be really unique, and with uniqueness comes loneliness.

Recently I had a conversation with a friend who told me that I am a non-conformist. At first, I was kind of taken back, but it didn’t take long before I began to embrace what that really meant. By definition, a non-conformist is a person whose behaviour or views do not conform to prevailing ideas or practices. It is who I am exactly! I felt oddly at ease that someone noticed that in me, yet I was joyed to know that my true colours were showing through; I was not allowing my inner voice to get in the way.

Realizing that I was a non-conformist made me realize why at times I have felt very lonely. I’ve always felt alone in a room filled with people; my real self rarely aligns with those in my company. Over time, I began to become very comforted by my loneliness, and now I have wholly embraced it. While at times I still have troubles with my inner voice bodyguard in social situations, the words that I write are never guarded; it is why I feel so profoundly comfortable using them. This is really me.

We are born alone, and we die alone. In between the posts of life, our inner voice protects us from being alone. I know that I am not alone with my trait of non-conformity, it’s just that so many of you are unwilling to allow yours to shine through. It is uncomfortable and painful to be alone sometimes; it is why we cry when we are born and being taken away from our mother’s warmth. It is why people cry for us when our life is taking us away from them when we die.

The question is, will you be crying when you die?

Author: Jeff Nagle

I am a father, husband, friend and foe. I am a copywriter and fitness trainer by day and blogger by night (but I write during the day too!).