I started this blog in January 2015 as a New Year’s resolution to write 50 blog posts throughout the year. I never really had a purpose in mind for the blog other than to write random thoughts that came to me. I had full intentions of ending it at the 50 post mark but there were many times throughout my resolution that I nearly had stopped. It started to become very difficult to think clearly on any one topic to write on. People stopped praising me on my work, the likes dissipated and the blog stats started to take a dive. As a result of these downturns my ambition started to plummet. “Why do I even bother sharing my thoughts?” I would often ask myself.
Robin Sharma has a great quote: “All change is hard at first, messy in the middle and beautiful in the end.”. What I was experiencing is that messy part in the middle. That time when we all give up because we loose sight of our ambitions from the start and the desire to see the end. But I was resolved to keep on writing and decided that I had to pivot. I had to dig deep and realize that I am not writing for the reader; I am writing for the writer. Like they say “dance as if nobody is watching”, well I took the stance to write as if nobody is reading. It was this time that my posts became more personal and open about my weaknesses and trials in life.
To me writing has been the most important tool to emotional stability. When I can write about my trials and come up with a solution to them and then share them with you, it gives me some accountability for positive change. Even though some of my favorite posts did not get any amount of outside attention, at the time those words spoke to me and changed me for the better. Being able to share my deepest thoughts with everyone in the world (including those who have wronged me) and expect nothing in return has been a huge hurdle but I have learned to give without reserve and for that I am more wise.
I am not sure where this journey will take me as I am still at that messy middle stage. I have a lot more to learn so I will continue to write about my journey in hopes that someday I can look back and piece it all together. It may take 101, 500 or 1,000 blog posts of sharing to find out what this all means, but I am determined to find out. I refuse to quit before the miracle.
If this is your first time reading, THANK YOU! If this is your 100th time reading, THANK YOU! In a world so fixated on quick consumable knowledge, reading is often cast aside as a time consuming inconvenience. Watching a video, listening to a podcast or audio book is much more efficient but the beauty of actual reading is that it allows us to use our own voice to connect the words to our minds. Thank you for taking time to read. If you continue to tag along and perhaps get a little something from my words, then I am graciously humbled. You inspire me, you really do.